Tentacles of life, coiling around my body..
dragging me down to the ground.
Bringing me back to the isolation I've always known..
soul withering inside, searching but nothing found.
Eyes fluttering, heart skipping a beat..
then realizing that I'm dead inside.
The skipping simply a reflection of what I once knew..
knowing what it's like to love,
but now those feelings have run to hide.
Why must you abandon me?
I've been here before, the wretching of one.
Left alone in the pseudo-comfort of solitude..
yet the fear strikes again as the body goes numb.
Gazing at the image of myself in the mirror,
hate christened upon my fingertips.
Looking inside the depths of myself for an answer,
but finding nothing except what you left behind,
sleight of hand, warmth of lips.
Everything echoing in my hallowed out remains..
twisting around what's left and leaving it askew.
What little sanity I had left..
perished with the love that I had for you.
Why must you abandon me?
My happiness based on the company of new.
The need for someone to be there..
Why did that someone have to be you?
You said you wouldn't lie.
You said you wouldn't make me cry.
The trust I had for you,
smoldering with the thoughts of.. who?
Why did you have to prove me right?
You know I had my doubts.
You took advantage of my insecurities..
abandoning me from the only hope I had left,
once again to travel down that solemn route.
rape me of my mind.
leave nothing left for anyone else to find.
Life, feelings, moralities..
Fading back to the crypt in which they evolved.
Simple words, complex consequences..
Continuing to fathom the loathing beneath one's shell.
Love, lust, need, desire, craving..
Bringing warmth to the skin, but cold piercing of the heart,
your own personal hell.
Those very words now meaning one and the same..
In love with lust, the desire to need.
Scraping of the skin, of the soul..
Trying to find what is real, only discovering that is what you bleed.
Those once treasured words, phrases..
Now hollowing out your insides, yet still seeking new life.
Why search for love, abandonment..
When all you desire is next door, in the arms of another's wife.
Simple pleasures, complex pain..
Striving to prove what is real to you, and what is not.
Feelings numbing, heart turned cold..
Echo of silence, trapped in your own cage, destined to do nothing,
but simply rot.
Everything once cherished, now destroyed..
How does she feel, knowing the power that she has over you.
Bringing you to your feet with nothing but a simple word..
Then watching you fall again, mission accomplished,
leaving to seek anew.
Love, marriage, I, you..
Words spoken and understood easily, rolling off the tongue.
You, afraid, I, lead..
Corrupting everything you once knew, an amalgam of dread now spun.
Why love, when this is the outcome..
The phrase "better to have loved.." was spoken by one who has never loved,
nothing to show of it.
People wonder why I hate..
I may get criticized for it, but I sure as hell won't die for it.